I went to see some a friend do some comedy on Monday, at the Cavendish Arms. It turned into one of the most bizarre evenings of my life.

Not enough acts turned up, as isn't unusual on an open-mike night. One chap had brought a lady along on a date, a musician. She volunteered to sing a couple of comic songs to pad out the show.

When his turn came, he proceeded to regale us with sordid tales of his Internet dating. Very sordid tales. The man a colossal pervert, basically.

Meanwhile, his date was squirming. Clearly this was all news to her. When she came up for her act she told the entire audience that she was never, never going to sleep with him now. Never ever.

She then proceeded to blow the rest of the acts off the stage. Funny, and a superb pianist. "Padding out" my, err, hat.

Somehow, I ended up with her phone number. I have no idea how - it's just so unlike me. I mean, with her date still around. Very alpha-male; not me at all. Must have been the Red Stripe.

So, should I ring her?

I hope the weather doesn't disrupt Roar this evening, since they have a very special guest this week. A guest I've been asked not to mention, though word of the embargo doesn't seem to have made it out to all parties. (And yes, Nick, the management have great connections.)

Even in the absence of "big names", though, Roar is always worth a visit if you are nearby. I don't always like every act, naturally, but I've never come away from the night disappointed.

You'll usually find me on a stool by the bar - best seats in the house!

I'm pushing my luck (and my stamina) this week. Beer with Steve on Tuesday, Graham Coxon last night, and the gorgeous Lucy Porter at Roar this evening. Three nights in a row, and at my age! Will I make it? Will I be of any use at work tomorrow?

Well worth coming down if you are in the area. In fact, Roar is going through a big name period at the moment - Harry Hill, Noel Fielding (of Mighty Boosh fame) and We Are Klang (who are going to be big names if there's any justice) are all coming up soon.

Insert predictable El Presidente comment to the effect that I'm never any use at work here.